This year at Walker High, we have had some exciting new residents. In addition to the two exchange students from Germany and Mexico, we have two new residents that hail from Norway. Their names are Loki and Thor, and though they are never seen on any given day, the two do appear every Friday at Walker’s football game to cheer on our own Viking football team. Luckily, I had a chance to interview the two at last Friday’s game vs. Russellville.
What part of Norway do you two come from?
“WE DO NOT HAIL FROM ANY EARTHLY COUNTRY, WE HAIL FROM VALHALLA!!” – Loki
Why have you two come to Jasper?
“ONE THOUSAND YEARS AGO, I HAD A VISION IN WHICH I SAW A GROUP OF VIKINGS IN A GREAT BATTLE. OBVIOUSLY, THEY EMERGED VICTORIOUS, SO AT THAT MOMENT I DECIDED THAT I MUST VISIT THIS BATTLE, AND EVERY ONE LEADING UP TO IT TO WATCH MY BROTHERS EMERGE VICTORIOUS.” – Thor
“THE BATTLE OF 5A FOOTBALL IN ALABAMA” – Thor
How do you get to the games every Friday?
“WE RIDE A CHARIOT MADE OF PURE LIGHTNING; THIS CHARIOT IS GUIDED BY TWO RAMS, NASHER AND MASHER.” – Loki
So… Where do you park at the games?
“WE PARK OUR LIGHTNING CHARIOT ABOVE THE THUNDER CLOUDS; THIS IS SO WE DO NOT BLIND OUR VIKING BROTHERS BEFORE THE GAME.” – Thor
Can you tell me what the day in the life of a Viking is like?
“WE GET UP AT FOUR IN THE MORNING, AND EAT A RAW COW!”
“AFTER EATING, WE RUN A MILE FOR EVERYTHING THAT WE HAVE KILLED IN OUR LIFETIME”
“WE THEN GO TO THE MEAD HALL, WHERE WE DRINK GLORIOUSLY UNTIL LUNCHTIME!”
“OF COURSE, EVERY VIKING NEEDS VEGGIES, SO WE THEN PROCEED TO EAT TREES…… WHOLE”
“AFTER LUNCH, WE KILL AS MANY OF OUR FOES AS POSSIBLE … UNTIL IT’S TIME FOR DINNER!”
“YES, AND FOR DINNER WE EAT THE ENEMIES THAT WE HAVE KILLED!!”
“AND FOR LEISURE TIME, WE ENJOY A LITTLE ‘CALL OF DUTY’”
“UNFORTUNATELY WE HAVE DESTROYED 10 TELEVISIONS IN THE PROCESS.”
Where did you get the money for these televisions?
“WE ARE GODS, DON’T QUESTION OUR METHODS.”
Okay, then. So what did you do before coming to Jasper?
“WE WERE IN THE COMMERCIAL BUSINESS; YOU MIGHT HAVE SEEN US ON VARIOUS CAPITOL ONE COMMERCIALS”
“WHAT’S IN YOUR WALLET??”
After the interview, I thanked Thor and Loki for allowing me to speak with them; it isn’t everyday that you get a chance to interview gods. If you want to keep up with what Thor and Loki are up to or what they are doing, you can follow them on Facebook. Or, if you have a question that you want to ask Thor and/or Loki, check back on the “Roving Reporter” section of our website; you will be able to ask them question on there soon, and you might even get that question answered!
By: Viking Media Guest Reporter